Mayor Avoids Tragedy With Help of Township Officer

A local city Mayor narrowly escaped injuries this past weekend as the result of a quick-thinking township officer who was on the scene. We were informed that the Mayor was attempting to mount a horse - a small golden palomino - even though he had never ridden a horse before.    

Bystanders at the scene confirmed that as the mayor was positioning himself in the saddle, the small palomino unexpectedly bolted and took off in a full gallop. Startled by the horse's unexpected actions the Mayor lost control of the reins and began to slide out of the saddle. To stop his sliding, the mayor attempted to grab the horse’s mane but no matter how hard he pulled the Mayor could not stop his downward decent.

Frantic that he would fall under the horse’s galloping hoofs, the Mayor threw his arms around the horse’s neck and held on tight but even then he continued to slide out of the saddle. The horse meanwhile was totally oblivious to the mayor’s plight and continued to gallop at full speed.   

Realizing it was just a matter of time before he would fall off the horse and land under the horses legs, the Mayor decided to leap from the horse and throw himself to safety. Unfortunately, his foot got entangled in one of the stirrups making it impossible to jump from the horse.

Just moments before falling completely off the horse, a local township officer from a nearby community who was entering Wal-Mart at that time saw the Mayor’s plight and quickly ran over to his aid. She unplugged the cord and assisted the Mayor in getting down from the horse.  She then checked him for any injuries. Though the Mayor was considerably shaken up by this horseback riding ordeal, he appeared unhurt - so the township officer left and entered Wal-Mart to continue on with her shopping.

All The Mayor Wanted Was a Quickie

A Mayor from Texas went to attend the Annual Mayor’s Conference which was held in Wisconsin. While in Dairy State the Mayor he entered a small restaurant that served beer.  The hostess seated him at a table and handed him a menu and said your waitress will be with you shortly.  Sure enough in a few minutes an attractive waitresses walked over and asked, "What would you like, sir?" 

The Mayor put down the menu - looked at the waitress. He starred at her beautiful complexion, her amazing facial features and her stunning figure. Then he smiled and said "I think I would like to have a quickie”?

Not amused the waitress turned around and walked away in disgust. After she regained her composure she returned to his table a few minutes later and asked again, "Sir, what would you like?"  The Mayor flashed her another broad smile and answered, "a quickie" is what I really want.

This time the waitress' anger took over; she reached out and slapped the Mayor across the face as hard as she could.  The result was a resounding "SMACK!" and then she stormed away.

An elderly gentleman who was sitting at the next table, sipping on a glass beer overhead everything that transpired.  He leaned over to the young man and said "your not from these pars are you?".  "No I am not, I am from Texas and I am up here on official business."  "I thought so said the gentle; well up here in Wisconsin we pronounce it 'quiche', ". 

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Who Gets the Chair?

During the late 1700's, few American colonists lived on big plantations.  Most eked out extremely meager existences in one-room wooden houses.  Because their houses were so small, family dining generally took place on a table pushed close against one wall.  The young children sat on a long wide board which folded down from the wall while the bigger children and wife sat on a rough sanded bench on the other side. 

Most households only had one chair which was generally very ornate in design.  During the day the wife would use this chair to tend to the children, crochet, knit or mend clothing. However, the chair was always reserved for the man of the house when it was time to eat.

Should a special guest be over when  a meal was served, that special guest was normally offered the chair to sit in while they ate their meal while the rest of the family, including the man of the house, would sit on the board attached to the wall or on the wooden bench.  Consequently, for someone to be asked to sit in the chair meant they were important - either an honored guest or perhaps someone in charge of something. 

The person to sit in the chair was commonly referred to as the 'Chair man' or 'Chair person'.  Today, this same expression or title is used in all levels of government - Federal, State and Local.  We use the word 'Chairman' or 'Chairperson' to signify who is in charge of our board and committee meetings in government.